Sunday, October 11, 2015

She Stiffed Me Fifty Cents

I woke up yesterday morning absolutely irate with an imaginary cashier at a grocery store from my dreams because she stole fifty cents from me.

I have no idea what I ate that might have caused such a realistic and ridiculous dream, but let it be known that if you ever steal fifty cents from me, I will find your manager (whose name was Gage, by the way, in this dream that needs to be analyzed) and give him a piece of my mind. And if he smirks at me because "it's just fifty cents," we will have a conversation about integrity and how the monetary amount couldn't matter less - it's a revelation of the heart.

Bless my heart.

I'm trying not to let my heart be hardened against the grocery store chain I dreamed of, but I'm not there, yet. She stole from me, y'all. And Gage didn't care.

So that's how my Saturday started.

And this is how it ended.

Photo courtesy of Travis Lister
My family has season tickets to Clemson, and we're kind of hard core.

While Hurricane Joaquin was sending his rain-remnants last week to South Carolina, we were watching the game. In the rain. Wearing get-ups like this.


And when ESPN College GameDay comes to town, you get a little carried away. Your engineer dad creates gutters for your tents to funnel away the rain,

Travis Lister
you cover the generator to protect it from the monsoon,

Travis Lister
and you exchange your traditional stuffed tigers for a rubber ducky replete with a poncho that you recovered from Bowman field.


You know you're going to get soaking wet, so you prepare yourself mentally and just go with it.

Travis Lister
And this week? Oops - we did it again.

When you were literally born in a college town the year before they last won a National Championship, you don't let little things like driving rain keep you home. Especially when said team is playing really well and is ranked as one of the top teams in the country.

So we went. And we got wet. And they won. And we came home.

And I slept really well after all the rain and excitement, but thank goodness the cashier and Gage didn't visit my dreams again. I have a feeling we would have fought.

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